Demotivational charge

This week I had the fortune to have two photoshoots. The first was with a family, my cousin's family; his wife called me a month ago asking me for some pictures and I was glad enough to do it that I didn't even charge her (not even a minimal amount). Just a week ago, another cousin called me asking me for a video for his husband and some photos, again I was happy to do it since I really need some practice and portfolio material, but then it started to get me. I was thinking of the money I could have right now if these photoshoots weren't asked from family. I really enjoy taking pictures, and most of the time editing them, but I've been feeling terrible since I don't have good equipment to carry on and I really have to fight in order to get some.

These are just a few pictures I happened to like a lot from the first photoshoot:

This is my niece, she's a very shy girl. When I entered my cousin's apartment I called her a couple of times and she ran to hide behind her mother. I asked my cousin's wife if she was shy or difficult to talk to, she just told me the baby was a little bit slow in terms of socializing but sooner or later she was going to feel curiosity, so I kept talking to the baby. I tried to ask questions and tell her I knew her games, that I was a kid too, and by the end of the photoshoot she was carefree and ran to me to have her picture taken.

We went to a beautiful place near their house; I wanted it to be in natural light because I still am not very confident with flashes (also I don't own equipment), so I tried to do my best with natural light. I told them to carry things for the photoshoot, they thought these were props but my intent was to have something that they could use as distraction so the pictures would turn out more natural.

It is hard enough for me to talk to people when I'm not used to (though I'm trying and I think I'm doing a pretty decent job), so it is harder to tell them "Hey, pose like this! Do this!" so when I take pictures like these I usually start by telling people: "Talk about something funny", the rest is up to them. 

My cousins were singing songs so the baby would dance and just after her dance, she dropped a bottle of glitter. She was extremely worried and everyone was mocking her (in a friendly way of course), so expressions like these are the ones I like to capture.

I feel happy about these pictures but now that I look at them I think of many ways of doing this job better; I suppose that's how it works. So, thanks to this shoot, I got one client. Since I uploaded these photos at Facebook, my cousins friends saw them and started making positive comments about them, so, one of these friends added me and asked me how much I was charging for a photoshoot and here is where I'm having a problem:

"Professional" photographers charge around 500-700 dlls for a photoshoot in my town and since I'm not a professional (I plan to become one though), of course I can't charge that much money! Nobody would pay me that much money for my photography! When this person contacted me, I told her I would charge her 60 dlls for 200 photos per session and 30 edited photos, she said it was great and she also told me about her little niece. I told her I would charge two sessions, so I now I will have 120 dlls in my pocket, but just after I told her the price, I banged my head to the table because I just realized maybe I could've charged a little bit more. 

The thing is: How do I balance the price of what I do? I was planning to charge small amounts of money and then charging more. I even told this lady that I wasn't a professional, that I was just starting and I was going to be cheap, but I want to know what's the limit on cheap stuff? This person thought 60 dlls was great, I want to know what's the limit, if people think that, I don't know, 100 dlls is a good deal for a simple session. I guess I'll have to investigate, it'll be hard. 

It's scary to be comissioned, I'm always afraid I won't do the job well, that something will fail at the very end. I'm also afraid to reject events because I don't have the right equipment to cover it. It's shameful and that's why I don't put myself out there, trying to sell a product. I feel like I'm still inside my nest, trying to fly and people come and feed me small amounts of food because I'm really scared to be out there hunting for my own stuff. 

I guess nobody with a good advice read this, I wish someone did though because I really need guidance from someone who knows this deal and business. Still, I'm happy I will be having two photoshoots soon, aside from all my insecurities and the fact that I know I'm selling a cheap product, I'm hopeful that this will be a good impulse for something bigger.